tehehehe

 

The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter --mark twain

 

 I don't trust anyone who doesn't laugh --maya angelou
 

One thing I love about the english language is all the different words we have to descrive laughter.  You can laugh. You can giggle. You can snort, chuckle, chortle, snicker, gaffaw, howl, roar, convulse, titter, whoop, cheer, cackle, etc.

Never Have I Ever

I've never...

1) Seen Shrek
2) Been to Buffalo Wild Wings
3) Licked a streamer (and don't recommend it..thats weird)
4) Been to a Pro Sports event
5) Slept under the stars (as in no tent or anything)
6) Left the country
7) Gone trick r treating
8) Been kissed in the rain
9) Worked at a fast food restaurant
10) Had a boyfriend

No, this is not a bucket list, just a list of things.......ya know, just chillin' and being subtle here....... ;)

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bloodmoney

So, contrasting unpopular belief, I am afraid of doctors. Most people know this, so this probably isnt news. However, not everyone knows that its a legit thing, not just "doctors are scary"...I actually had a panic attack at the thought of the possibility of going to a hospital just to visit someone. This is not an irrational fear, because it makes sense-doctors are clearly out to kill me if they see me.  I am learning to cope, though. Over the summer I visited the nurse four times. The first visit took four days of pain and four cups of coffee to convince me to go, but then she gave me wonderful ibuprofen and I decided that she was no longer a nurse, she was BackAllySally, my drug dealer. Sure, it was hard and I almost cried, but I survived.  More recently, as in yesterday, I took my courage a step further. In this case, it took a lack of funds and bills to pay, but I managed to go to Biolife to sell my Plasma. They call it donating, but thats not what it is, its selling. When I first walked in, I wasnt sure I'd make it out alive, what with all the awful doctor smells and scary people in white lab coats and people hooked up to machines sucking their life (okay, blood) out of them.  I immediately found the bathroom and took a few deep breathes before returning to the front desk.  I answered a few questions, forcing myself to rremain calm so my pulse wouldnt be too high, then had them nearly cut my finger off with their pinprick needle thing. They stole my fingerprint and sent me to answer computer questions, then a physical, then they sent me to the deathmachines. Honestly, I was pretty okay with them. It was kinda cool to see the process, and next time i might watch them stab me. What wasnt cool was halfway through my mind almost went towards the panic-attack-trail, but I distracted myself with the free wifi. Another not cool thing was they had to switch arms in the middle of the process, so I had two arms taped up and couldnt fully bend them for the next three hours.  All in all, I made it out alive without any problems, and plan to go back (maybe wednesday).  Im gonna see how long I can make it without spending my bloodmoney, maybe make it like a savings account card. We shall see.

Also, on an unrelated topic, my phone has been wigging out for the last couple weeks, but I hopefully fixed it. I had to drive to where I had adequate coverage and reprogram my phone so my internet and texting and calling would all work all the time. I was to the point where my texting only worked half the time, my calling sometimes didnt work, and my internet never worked. Just thought id share that with you :)

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If you play with fire...

...you are gonna get burned. Or if you have your head in the clouds while cooking.  Slightly sleeping still and making breakfast, I went about my usual pattern for making Ramen (yes, I know, Ramen for breakfast is weird) this morning- grab a pot, put water in it, put it on the burner, turn the burner on, wait for it to boil, etc.  Not too long but not too short after that I was frustrated to see that my water wasnt even close to boiling, and should have been (my toast was done already, after all).  Soon after I realized that I had failed to turn on the correct burner, rolled my eyes at my sleepy self, and moved the pot over.  What I had failed to notice was that the handle of the pot was sitting directly over a red hot burner, and had grown quite steamy itself.  This was brought to my attention with a string of swear words and a now painfully burnt hand.  I hope next time I learn better.

**authors note** while the above blogpost seems brief and possibly uninteresting, as well as a waste of your time, I just wanted to share something in story form.  It is much more interesting than a facebook status reading "burnt my hand today cuz i had the wrong burner on"usually and as faithful followers, you seem to enjoy trivial stories about my life.  Thank you for your time, ~Mer~

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I am writing this at 4:14 PM on Monday, May 9th 2011.  It is windy and stormy out.  I am at my house.

If all goes well, its my 18th birthday when this posts.  I'm hoping that I forget all about this.  If no one else has commented on this, please do so I see it and remember it!

Dear Mer,

Happy Birthday!  Its weird to wish you that because I'm not sure I ever have!  I hope you still go by Mer.  It would be sad if you didn't.  First, for my sake, your sake, and our thousands of blog readers' sakes, I'm gonna make some predictions.  Its the end of your Senior Year, so you're probably still living at home.  Hopefully, you are presently at Lake Ellen, working as a Wrangler.  I don't have my liscense yet, but I'm sure you do.  You probably have a car by now too.  I'm gonna guess you've still been going to CGs, even if the Elmhorsts have moved to their other house in Rhinelander.  You're probably still single and probably haven't ever not been yet.  Not that I don't have hope of ever haveing a boyfriend, but honestly, I don't know very many guys deserving of that title.  If you don't work at camp, that means you have another job, so I know for sure you are employed somewhere.  You aren't planning on going to college any time soon, and still don't know what to do with your life.  Emily and James have their own apartment, besides the Garage, and certainly shouldn't be in TJ's room yet.  Also, TJ has been a marine for a year now, and sometimes you miss him because you are still homeschooled and bored a lot. WHOAH wait, no! You're GRADUATED!!!! hah! Can't wait for that!!!

Friends.  Hmmm.  I bet you're still friends with Megan.  You're still friends with Billie and Phillip, and they are probably still a couple.  Maybe Megan and Boomer are married or something by now.  Maybe Emily and James have a kid.  Doubt that though.  Tami is still your friend too.  And of course, the Elmhorsts.  I'm actually 'chatting' with Becca as I write this.  She'll probably be like a millionaire.  I know, its only a little over a year, but still.  Oh, and YEAH! is still fun, and you're still on leadership team.  I bet Cana has a boyfriend by now.  Haley is fifteen and will definately NOT have her temps yet haha.

You're life is more exciting by now, I'm sure.  You don't spend as much time at home, because you can drive and have a car by now.  You have your own bowling shoes too.  And a cartilage piercing.  Remember when TJ said you should get that tattoo of a heart that says "Love Hungry" in it? On your wrist?  Only it wouldn't say that, it would say something cooler? You should think about that, now that you're eighteen and all.

or as Becca just said:

"you never know...you might decide to go to college for advenced math and become a whiz and marry a science nerd and have 10 smart babies running around"

now THAT I seriously doubt!

 

It is possible all my predictions are wrong.  You could have an apartment.  You could have a boyfriend (if you do, I hope he's quite good-looking).  For all I know, you're married! (again, I doubt it).  You could not have a car.  You could not have a job.  You could have failed everything.  You could be in college.  Who knows.

 

There are a few things I'm sure are still true.  Batman is your favorite, still.  I JUST REALIZED DOCTOR WHO SEASON SIX WILL BE ON DVD BY NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So yeah, you'll still like Doctor Who.  You'll still be nerdy and like all the superhero stuff.  You'll still be blonde.  You'll still be super weird.  You'll still be a Christian.  Jack will still be your favorite cat ever.  You'll still have your crayons.

 

Okay, this is getting long.  I have to wrap this up.  Some words of wisdom:  Stay strong.  Never give up.  Always persevere.  Don't spit into the wind.

 

Love,

 

~Murrbeth~

 

Dear Readers,

 

I hope I have kept up this blog til now.   I kind of hope its grown better over the last year, but if not, oh well I guess.  I hope I've kept you entertained, made you think, made you laugh. I hope I'm still alive.  If not, this probably made you cry or something rediculous.  Love you all!  Thanks for sticking with me for all this time!

 

Love,

 

~mer~

 

P.S. to myself-  do you still like disney movies? and have all my posters?  and still watch nerimon and charlieissocoollike on youtube?  who are you going to vote for?  think about that!!!  do you still write stories?  do you still like zelda? psh of course you like zelda, what a stupid question.  WRITE BACK SOON!!! (for your readers sakes! and mine! ha!)

Hitch up Philippe, Belle, I'm off to the Fair!!

Well, I'm off to camp again!  The last couple of months have been very busy and slightly stressful, and I'm sure I will appreciate a few months to get away from drama and life.  I will miss everyone of course, and there are a lot of things I would have liked to participate in this summer, but I'm hoping the next month and half (or two months or whatever it is) will be fun and purposeful and I will create lasting memories.  So don't expect any blogging for a while, because I've been lazy as it is...  BYEZ

Remember When

So I’ve had this blog for a while now, and decided to go through and read all my previous posts. Its fun to look back and say “remember when it snowed in April?!” which would have been crazy this year since it really hardly snowed. Or remember when I didn’t have a driver’s license? Or when I played Halo all the time? Or actually consistently remembered superhero Thursdays? Some memories are happy, some are a bit sad. Some just need updates. Remember my story on Buddy, and Sue, the lady who bought him? If you don’t, it was last year April I think, you can go read it…

Anyways, I sold Buddy to her and shortly after I left for camp. Well, we recently sold our house, and I was being all sentimental and thinking about all the great memories, so I emailed Sue to ask if I could maybe go visit Buddy. She replied the next day, with a surprising NO. According to her, he did not have navicular disease like my bet diagnosed, and it was my fault that she bought a horse with a foot fungus. He also got limes disease, and has been through a lot of expensive therapy and will never be ridden again. I’m not sure how much is exaggerated, but I think she wrongfully put the blame on me. How was I supposed to know anything? I was what, sixteen? So yeah, that was a bit upsetting.

Another update… the little white stalker car with the blue lights? I see it all the time. Random update, I know. And Peter the Purple People Eater (my car) is actually my car. Grad present. As well as a kickass sound system in it.

Anyways, I was reading through all these because I’ve had a stressful week…and month. Well…a stressful, busy month and a pretty crappy week. It was nice to see that even a year ago I had the same crappy days and just wanted to run away from the world. I can tell when things were happening by how I blogged. I can even tell when I was lying about being alright.

I apologize all the time for this, but sorry its been a while. Even though I have internet now, I rarely am motivated to blog. I think its because I’ve been a little bit overwhelmed for the last month or two. Just a lot going on. So yeah, I’ll try and keep things up a little better.

Later, Bro

I just saw the Avengers. It was amazing. Amazing as in Batman has some competition...and Beauty and the Beast might too, as far as super amazing movies go. Cuz it was super awesome. Yeah.

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pet peeves

So, one question asked on surveys or for ice breakers or whatnot is "what is your biggest pet peeve?"  I've never really been able to figure out what mine was, but I have recently discovered it.  Now, for those of you who who probably know who you are *cough*wendy*cough* even though I wont say names...me telling you my biggest pet peeve does not mean I want you to abuse the knowledge and annoy the crap out of me.  Now, with that out of the way, I can continue.

Most people know that I am a picky eater.  There are a lot of foods that I just plain dont like, some that I detest, some that I just dont prefer.  That doesnt mean I cant or wont eat them, just prefer not to.  What i cannot stand, though, is people telling me what foods I do or dont like, or assuming I dont like something, or assuming that just because I dont like it I wont eat it.  Of all those things, the thing that bothers me the most is when people say "oh, bethy doesnt like (insert food here, like oranges)" when I in fact DO like oranges, or whatever they say I dont.  My bro used to tell everyone that I hated oranges, but liked apples. It was very annoying because I loved oranges and didnt prefer apples (now I like both).

So there you have it, my biggest pet peeve. Dont abuse the information, use it as a hint or tip to avoid around me. Please and thank you.

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Home is Where the Heart Is

Dictionary.com defines home as:

1.     a house, apartment, or other shelter that is the usual residence of a person, family, or household.

2.     the place in which one's domestic affections are centered.

3.     an institution for the homeless, sick, etc.: a nursing home.

4.     the dwelling place or retreat of an animal.

5.     the place or region where something is native or most common.

UrbanDictionary defines home as:

A word that means something different to each person who uses it. A person's home can be the place where they live, the place they grew up, or the place where the people they care about live. In the case of some people, home is a variable concept, changing dependant on the placement of another person or object, or a person may even consider his or her own body the only 'true' home.

or...

That person against whom you can rest your head and your heart and everything feels safe; the place where you are not alone.  The place where you are not alone. (yes, I intentionally repeated that)

Just some things I was thinking about.

Change.

I was writing a different post, but then was inspired to write this, and was looking up quotes about how people change (I like quotes, quotes are good).  I came across one that read "Theres no such thing as people changing, you only get to know them better."  I do not believe this too be true.  I've changed a lot in the last year, as I'm sure a lot of people have noticed.  I don't think change is bad, but its hard.

People don't expect you to change.  They expect you to stay exactly how they remember you, how they think they know you.  You get caught, trapped in being someone who you aren't anymore, someone who you used to be.  Sometimes you want to change, but you feel like you will lose people because they don't understand.  You've let yourself become defined as someone, and no one wants to let that definition change.  You aren't even sure if you CAN change it.

Or you change and people think something is wrong.  I used to be really talkitive, hyper, energetic.  Now I talk less.  Its not that I'm always sad, or down, or thinking really hard about some overwhelming obstacle in my life.  Sometimes, I'm sure that is a reason.  Sometimes, I'm just in a bad mood.  A lot of the time, I honestly just don't have anything to say.  I don't mind sitting and listening to other people talk (unless its morning, I'm still not a morning conversationalist).  Yet people assume that if I'm not talking or acting in an outgoing manner (I'm sure theres a word for that...I'm trying to get around using the word obnoxious because thats not quite what I'm looking for...) that there is something wrong with me.  Some assume, others ask.  I usually tell them I'm fine, and a lot of the time, I am.

Sometimes, people really are just fine.  A lot of people will ask, and they get the answer of "I'm fine" so they either ask again, or they just nod but don't believe it.  Which is okay, because sometimes people aren't fine.  But if they don't want to talk about it, its okay.  Maybe they just don't want to talk to YOU about it, or they aren't ready to.

Another quote for you, since I've been looking at them on and off while writing this.

 "I don't know that love changes.  People change.  Circumstances change."

Yearly survey

A. *****~What would you do if..?~*****
1...You had to go so bad, at the mall, that you didn't pay absolutely no attention to which bathrooms were which and you accidentally ran into the guys restroom when a hot guy in there saw you?....well, I if I really had to go that bad, I don't think I would notice. Afterward I'd prolly just avoid eye contact.

2...You found out that your b/f was really your cousin? I think I know all my cousins....but that would be really awkward

3...Decent guys really existed? Keep looking, and hope I found one

4...You found out that your Mom isn't really a teacher, but really a garbage man? My mom is a MAN?!?!?

5...You were the only person left on earth? Start a garden, have lots of kitty friends. Talk to manikins

6...The world was about to end and you only had a day to do whatever you can for the last and final day of your precious life? Go skydiving. Without a parachute.

7...Blondes ruled the world? Am I in charge?

8...Taking baths and showers were against the law and you had to either take mudd baths or go around smellin? Stand in the rain

9...Britney Spears was touring your town and you got pulled up stage with her? Wave to the crowd and benreallymnervous because I hate being on stage

10...Internet Services were shut down forever? Spend more time at the library. Text more.

B. *****~Do you think...?~*****

1...Rebel-type guys with spiky hair, chains, earrings, tattoos, and baggy clothes are sexy? Not too baggy of clothes, or too many piercings, or too many tattoos, then yes

2...Aliens exist? Obviously, I am one

3...Seafood is good? Noooooo especially not shrimp

4...Reading is fun? Yeessssss

5...Someday, Killer Tomatoes are going to attack everyone and destroy the earth? R they green tomatoes?

6...Your Garbage Man is sexy? I've never met him...but the FedEx guy is quite attractive ;)

7...Ricky Martin is really gay in real-life? Who?

8...Spongebob Squarepants is sexy? Ick.

9...Toe Socks are cool? They can be

10...String Cheese is fun to play with and eat? Always

11...Bubble wrap is fun to pop? It's amazing, always brings a smile to my face

12...That the first people ever to appear on earth were molded with clay and somehow turned alive? Um, not exactly. God made them from dirt tho

13...School Sucks? Definitely

14...Building blocks are still fun? They are sometimes

15...Them work out things they show on TV really work? For some people, if u diet too

16...Marylin (sp?) Manson is sexy? Ummm not sure what she looks like....

They Say I'm Crazy.....

So, apparently I am the only teen on the face of the earth who has never seen Shrek. Am I really missing out? It doesnt look like anything remotely interesting, and the fact that everyone thinks I am crazy for having NOT seen it almost makes me want to not see it.  That way i can keep blowing minds and saying, yeah ive never seen it sorry.

I watch a lot of movies. How can it be that an awesome movie could escape my notice? Clearly, it isnt all that awesome.  Then again, there are loads of awesome movies that other people have managed to miss... like "A Knight's Tale." Or "Whats Eating Gilbert Grape."

Are there any other must-see movies that I havent seen?

Also, I looked up the bottom 100 movie list on IMDb (awesome movie site) and Ive seen two on that list.... iI didnt think they were that awful, but I see how they got there.

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I get by with a little help from my friends

Friendship is such a unique thing.  There are a lot of different types of friends.  There are friends who you like to hang out with, but aren't close enough to talk to about everything.  There are friends who are to far away to hang out with, but you can talk to about anything.  There are friends who you would drop everything to hang out with.

Some wise person once said "it is better to have a few close friends, than to be friends with everyone." At least it sounds familiar.  Countless songs are written about friends, with logical and smart and sometimes wise things in them about friends.

I'm so thankful for my friends. 

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Thats Logistics

I have a story I am writing, fantasy wafare.  I am finding that it is very difficult to successfully write about a war, let alone a single battle scene.  To add to the fact, I don't have a computer I can use more than a few times a month, and it doesn't have internet.  A laptop would be very very helpful, but I can't afford one.

One of the difficulties I'm having is logistics.  When I started, I didn't think about the logistics of a battle.  I don't know the population my fantasy land (Felenore), how big their army could be, how big of an army they could support, how they would support it, etc.  How would they make sure they had weapons for everyone?  Or horses, food, and shelter?  Do they have a draft, or do they just sign up? Is there an age limit?  I don't even have a detailed map drawn up, its just in my head.

When I started, I didn't even think about why they were at war, it was merely that the enemy had attacked.  I can't have the enemy land attack merely because they are evil, thats rediculous.  It would have to be revenge, land, money, or power.  Revenge isn't a likely cause, as while a king may be angry with someone, the men of his country would not be eager to attack.  I also have to think logistics for the attacking country.

Then there are the individual battles, and scenes within those.  I still need to map out cities/battle fronts.  They can't all be the same, that would become boring to read.  While it is a fantasy, there is not an overpowering presense of magic, so that wouldn't play much of a role in a battle.  I can write from just the main character's point of view, or from another character, or from an enemy, or from a general birds eye view, or switch between multiple viewpoints.

Basically, its all very frustrating, and seems impossible to get my thoughts in order for everything.  I'm thinking about starting a binder just for this story, so even if I can't work on the story itself, I can work on logistics, maps, battle plans, etc.  Typing things out helps my brain sort it all out, too, which is why I'm posting this.  I'm sure that while you would all love to hear about plots and such, I am not sharing.  You have to wait for that.

When its planes in the sky for a chain of supply that's logistics.

When the parts for the line come precisely on time that's logistics.

A continuous link that is always in sync that's logistics.
There will be no more stress 'cause you've called UPS, that's logistics

Facebook is like Prison. You talk to a wall and get poked by people you don't know.

Sometimes I wonder why people even bother chatting with people on facebook.  Especially those certain ones who you don't want to be talking to, but can't ignore them every time.  How many times do I have to respond with just a "haha" or "lol" or "yup" or "yeah"  before you get the idea that I don't want to talk to you?  Its not even a conversation.  I'm basically like talking to a wall, why do you keep trying to save the conversation???  Not to mention the fact that while I hardly talk to you on fb, I've still said more online than in real life!

Speaking of Facebook, I've seen a lot of complaints about the new Timeline.  Personally, I don't understand the complaints.  Its not as if you are paying for facebook, why complain?  And if you don't like the new facebook, don't use it, especially don't use it to complain about it.  Its absurd, its the equivilant of me calling you to tell you I'm giving you the silent treatment.  DOESN"T WORK THAT WAY!!!

So yeah, a few other updates:  I have a smartphone now, but most of you knew that already.  This means I have the capability of texting now YAY!  I bought a new snowboard, because originally I was just going to buy the boots and bindings, but I got the bindings home and they didn't fit on either of the boards I have.  Rather frustrated, I went and bought the board from the same guy.  Also, I have a phone interview tomorrow, for a housekeeping position at the hospital.  I hope I get it, but we'll see how it goes.  I'm slightly scared to get it, due to the fact that I don't know why I applied in the first place, since I'm slightly terrified of doctors.  Silly me.  When I went in and asked for the application, I didn't freak out at all, so I think I can do it.  Its only scary if I'm going to the doctor, not just being around them.  I'll let you know how that goes.

untitled

This is a poem a friend of mine posted on facebook and I really liked it and wanted to share it :)

Once I came upon a place
Of grief and misery
I saw a man, alone and cold
... And found that he was me.
I look back now,
At that wretched place
And laugh and sometimes cry
Because the man I used to be,
He deserved to die.
But now I have this new-found hope,
This joy
This peace
This love.
I feel my new life's warm embrace
From the Lord Himself, above.
I didn't deserve a second chance,
Or a third or fourth of fifth.
But He loves me so much
And I know that I was missed.

by Garrett Wussow

Too Many in Too Little of Time

I've seen way too many movies in the theatre lately.  Wayyy too many.  So I thought I'd rate them for you, using my rating system, in order of appearance.

Tower Heist:  4 Stars

Immortals:  2 Stars

Sherlock Holmes:  5 Stars

Mission Impossible:  4 Stars

War Horse:  3 Stars

Coming Soon that I'm super excited for:  The Hunger Games!!!!!! Beauty and the Beast 3D!!!!!! Batman!!!!  MIB!!!!!!(thats Men In Black, if you don't know that)

How do you respond to the face in the mirror?

James 1:22-25

[22] But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, decieving yourselves. [23] For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. [24] For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. [25] But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing.